Brooklyn Nine-Nine Wiki
Brooklyn Nine-Nine Wiki

"Operation: Broken Feather" is the 15th episode of Season One in the Brooklyn Nine-Nine television series. It originally aired on 2nd February 2014 to 15.07 million viewers. Viewers give it 8 out 10 on IMDb.

Episode Synopsis

Amy Santiago is considering leaving the 99th Precinct in favor of a desk job at Major Crimes. Meanwhile, the Raymond Holt and Terry Jeffords experiment to see just how efficient they can make the precinct when it comes to finishing paperwork.


The squad engages in an American football match against the fire department. Terry emerges as the top scorer, while Boone challenges Jake to contribute at least one goal. Accepting the challenge, Jake agrees and with the help of Terry's assistance, he is carried all the way to the goal, successfully scoring a point. The Nine-Nine devises a plan to delay the Vulture from seizing their case.

Holt and Terry come up with a plan to increase efficiency in the workplace by making some changes based on other detectives behaviors that Terry has observed for the last several years.

Jake switches clothes with the auctioneer so that he can observe from a better viewpoint. While on stage pretending to be an auctioneer, Jake comes up with ridiculous stories for all of the items being auctioned.

Terry is pleased with the changes that they've made, but Holt wants to continue increasing efficiency. Terry reminds him of the story of Icarus and how he didn't know when to quit, and he died. Holt asks him if he's familiar with the story of Moneyball, wherein a man uses statistics and logic to win several baseball games; he calls it his favorite film.

Adam Sandler interrupts Jake's auctioning and goes onstage, opening up an auction to pay to see him stick a sock in Jake's mouth. Football player Joe Theismann buys this opportunity for $1300 and offers to pay extra if he can do it himself. Jake identifies the suspect and tackles him. He accidentally takes down Joe Theismann and breaks his other leg. Sandler reports that he recorded it.

On their way out of the hotel, Amy tells Jake that she's still going to do the job interview with Major Crimes, because it's a great opportunity for her. Jake calls her a bad partner because she's joining forces with the enemy.

Jake returns to the precinct to find Scully at his desk. Holt had placed him there because he wastes time when he sits next to Hitchcock. Jake sends him to work in the break room. Jake is upset that Holt didn't try to talk Amy out of taking a job with Major Crimes.

In the break room, the toaster catches on fire. Charles comes in and tries to put it out, but the fringe on his coat catches fire. Rosa tries to put him out, but the fire extinguisher is empty. Terry covers Charles with a blanket and puts out the fire. In his office, Terry begs Holt to stop. Gina interrupts and tells them that it would be a lot more efficient if the two of them did more working and less experimenting.

In the Major Crimes division, Jake apologizes to Amy for calling her a bad partner and tells her that he should have been more supportive. He wrote her a letter of recommendation, but tells her that it's riddled with spelling errors. Amy tells him that she already turned down the job. Jake then tricks the Vulture into holding a can of tear gas and runs out with Amy, leaving the Vulture hopeless as the can of tear gas explodes.


Movies

  • After scoring a touchdown, with the help of Terry, Jake announces, “I’m the king of the world!” This is a reference to the popular line from the 1997 film Titanic.
  • Jake says the teargas made Amy’s eyes look like the demon dogs at the end of the 1984 film Ghostbusters. In the film, the Terror Dogs have glowing red eyes.
  • Jake often compares Captain Holt to a robot, but when Holt remembers to say goodbye at the end of their conversation, Jake says "It's learning" - a quote from the 1983 film WarGames
  • To illustrate her betrayal of interviewing with Major Crimes, Jake compares Amy to the fictional character Iago. Amy assumes he means the antagonist from Williams Shakespeare’s Othello who betrayed the title character.
  • Captain Holt mentions that his favorite movie is the 2011 baseball film Moneyball, starring Brad Pitt.

Television Shows

  • When Charles grabs a sweater from the lost and found, Gina remarks that it looks like he's staring in an Albanian remake of The Cosby Show. In the show, the main character, Dr. Cliff Huxtable is known for wearing colorful sweaters.
  • Terry compares Holt to the Greek of legend, Icarus. Icarus’ father constructs for him wings of wax and feathers but warns him not to fly too high. Icarus ignores the warnings and flies too close to the sun. His wings melt, causing him to fall into the sea. This is often used as a metaphor for the consequences of personal over-ambition.

Actors

  • Jake asks Adam Sandler what role Kevin James will play in his next film. This is because the two actors frequently work together.

Spots

  • When Jake tackles the perp, he also knocks over football legend Joe Theismann. Theismann shouts “My leg! My leg! You broke my other leg!” This is referencing Theismann’s 1985 football injury that ended his career.


Raymond Holt
Oh my god, we're doomed. Boyle looks like a lesbian.

Irwin, how would you like to have the honor of being the first man to undress in front of Amy Santiago?
...


Jake: We've busted murderers, we've taken down cartels. But today we face the worst New York has to offer... The Fire Department. [Jake walks up towards Boone] Fire Marshal Boone, we meet again.

Boone: Detective Peralta, your fly's down. I made you look.

Jake: I didn't look. And I'm wearing shorts, there is no fly.

Boone: That's not what your mom said.

Jake: You make no sense.

Boone: And now I'm inside your head.

Jake: Prepare to d*e. [Jake walks away]

[Next scene]

Jake: Blue 52. Hut. [He passes the football to Terry]

[All grunting]

[Terry tackles two people and scores a touchdown]

Terry: Yeah! [Terry starts dancing]

[All cheering]

♪ Nothing's gonna ever keep you down ♪

♪ You're the best around ♪

[All grunting]

[Terry is carrying multiple firemen into the endzone]

[Cheers and applause]

Terry: Ah, ah, ah. [Terry starts dancing again]

Boone: You don't have to dance every time.

Terry: True, but I choose to dance every time. [Laughs]

[Both jump up and tap shoulders and grunt]

Terry: Whoo!

Boone: You have one play. You give the ball to Jeffords, and he runs it in. I-I'd like to see you score one.

Jake: Good, 'cause you're about to see it. You're about to see it straight to hell. [Jake turns around and walks away] Hut, hut.

♪ You're the best

Jake: Now, Terry. [Terry lifts Jake over his shoulder across the field]

♪ Nothing's gonna ever keep you down ♪

[Terry carries Jake all the way to the endzone]

Jake: Yeah! I did it. I did it alone. I'm the King of the world! Whoo!

♪ Intro Sequence ♪

Jake: ♪ Cream in my coffee and rock and roll ♪

Holt: Peralta.

Jake: Ah, Captain Holt. You look very... sad? I can never tell.

Holt: Do you have a m*rder suspect to question?

Jake: He is in the interrogation room as we speak, sitting and, I assume, stewing. I put on a song that I think sums up his situation nicely.

[Flashes to the interegation room where the suspect is playing Sonny & Cher's I Got You Babe]

♪ I got you, babe ♪

[Flashes back to the present]

Jake: Because, you see...

Holt: You got him, babe. I understood the wordplay, yes.

Jake: Oh. I've been chasing this guy for three months. I've got him dead to rights. Fingerprints, witnesses, it's in the bag. So I'm just gonna grab a healthy breakfast--

Holt: Are those gummy bears wrapped in a fruit roll-up?

Jake: Breakfast burrito, but yeah.

Holt: I pity your dentist. [Holt walks away]

Jake: Ah, joke's on you. I don't have a dentist.

Amy: Jake, Jake.

Jake: Uh-oh, this can't be good.

Terry: Major crimes division just called. They're taking over your m*rder case. The Vulture is on his way here now.

Jake: No! Doesn't that guy get tired of stealing our cases? He took one from me and Rosa last week.

[Flashes to Jake and Rosa chasing a suspect]

Jake: NYPD. Stop!

Rosa: Ugh. You made us run up ten flights of stairs.

Jake: It's over.

Pembrooke: [Comes out of the elevator] Thanks, guys.[Tosses an apple at Jake] I got it from here.

[Flashes forward to the present]

Amy: Don't worry, we can stall him until you get the confession. We rehearsed this, you guys. This isn't a drill. Everyone know their assignments?

Jake: All right, hands in. Commence operation: Broken feather. And go!

[Next scene]

Jake: Okay, Gus, I don't have a lot of time. I need your full, signed confession. We have four minutes. We can do this.

Gus: But I'm not guilty.

Jake: Listen to me, Gus. We can do this, son.

Pembrooke: [Gets out of his car and slams the door] Yo, is this a police station or a toilet? 'Cause all I see is turds. [Chuckles]

Charles: Oh, Detective Pembroke. [Charles bumps into Pembrooke spilling coffee all over]

[Slow-motion grunt]

Charles: Oh, no. I spilled coffee on you by accident.

Pembrooke: Lucky for you, this wipes off quickly. This coat's made out of whale skin.

Charles: [On the phone] The vulture still flies. The vulture still flies.

Rosa: Hey, Pembroke. What do you say we go talk about a case in the break room?

Pembrooke: Oh, yeah? What case is that?

Rosa: The case of how you got so damn sexy.

Pembrooke: God owed me a favor. Case solved.

Gus: I told you, I didn't know the guy.

Jake: You're lying. We have pictures of you two. Come on, we only have three minutes. It's like you're not even trying to confess!

Amy: [Running into the bullpen] The Vulture is coming. We need more time. Someone do something.

Scully: I got it. Tear gas. [Takes out a tear gas and releases the clip]

[Overlapping shouting]

Hitchcock: Scully, Scully, wrap my shirt around your face. [Takes off shirt and throws it to Scully]

[All coughing]

Pembrooke: [With sunglasses he walks through the tear gas uneffected] And out of the tear gas rises the Phoenix. [Laughs]

[Next scene]

Pembrooke: [Grunts while kicking the door open] Hey, Peralta. I got it from here.

Jake: [Sighs] All right, fine. I'll just go then... With this fully signed confession. We did it, Gus! [Jake high fives Gus]

Gus: Whoo! Suck it, vulture. I k*lled that guy and his neighbor, but you were too late.

Jake: Whoo! Wait, you k*lled his neighbor?

[Next scene]

Jake: Amy, check it out. [Shows her a picture of them both with the signed confession]

Amy: Nice, you got it framed?

Jake: Of course. It commemorates our victory over The Vulture, the greatest day in human history. Sorry the tear gas made you look like a demon dog at the end of Ghostbusters.

Holt: [Enters his office] Brief me on the hotel robberies.

Jake: Helpful hint to the scientists that programmed you, most humans say "hello" at the beginning of a conversation.

Amy: Manager at The Prentiss Hotel told us that someone's been breaking into the rooms, stolen over $100,000 in jewelry. We're heading over there now.

Holt: Keep me updated.

Jake: Another helpful hint--

Holt: Good-bye.

Jake: [Whispers] It's learning. [Amy grabs his arm and drags him out of Holts office] What?

[Next scene]

Jake: Man, an hour of footage, and we've got nothing.

Amy: I have to admit, I do love a thorough vacumer. I'm a little O.C.D.

Jake: What? No, you're not. [Moves her shirt collar] Whoop.

Amy: I can leave it there.

Jake: Totally.

Amy: It doesn't bother me.

Jake: I know.

[Amy fixes her shirt collar]

Jake: There it is.

Terry: All right, let's get started. So we have good news, and we have bad news.

Charles: My Nana always said, "bad news first, because the good news is probably a lie." Fun fact, she made me cry a lot.

Rosa: Good news is, the sting we set up to catch deadbeats went great.

[Flashes to Terry and Rosas sting]

Bill Voss: Name's Bill Voss, just got this thing in the mail, said I won a free Bahamas cruise!

Terry: Congratulations, Bill. [Shows his badge] You have six outstanding warrants for credit fraud.

[Rosa handcuffs him]

Bill Voss: Oh, man, can't it wait till I get back from the Bahamas? I won a cruise.

Rosa: You're not very bright, are you, Bill?

[Flashes back to the present]

Holt: Now I know you'd all prefer to go to a bar, drink beer, and eat chips of various textures. But our CompStat numbers are due tomorrow morning, so I need these arrests on the books today.

Charles: Darn it. I had a belly dancing class. Tonight was Egyptian undulation.

Gina: Oh, show us some moves.

Charles: Sure.

Holt: Dismissed.

[Next scene]

Gina: First batch of arrest files is done-zo Washington.

Terry: There's only three files here. It's been an hour.

Gina: Yeah, I know. It has not been a productive morning.

[Flashes to Charles seeing somebody use the toaster]

Gina: For example, somebody used the toaster in front of Boyle.

Charles: No. No, no, no, no. Tommy?

Gina: And then Boyle spent 30 minutes lecturing him on how to make a sandwich.

[Flashes back to the present]

Gina: I'd describe the work flow today as dismal with a tiny, little splash of pathetic.

[Indistinct chatter]

Arrested Man: Get me out of here, man.

[Next scene]

Holt: I'm worried. The CompStat numbers are due tomorrow at 9:00 A.M., but at this rate, we won't be finished until your daughters are grown and married.

Terry: I may have a solution. We need to CompStat the office. What is CompStat? It's just using data to identify problem spots in the neighborhood. Now, I have been taking notes on points of friction in this office for years. The red areas are places where no work gets done. If we can fix these problems without anyone knowing what we're doing, we will finish on time.

Holt: Are you saying you want to secretly perform scientific experiments on your friends and coworkers to increase efficiency?

Terry: Yes.

Holt: Sounds fun, let's do it.

Jake: Hey, hand me some peanuts. I'm snacky.

Amy: I have something I need to talk to you about. I might get a promotion to major crimes. They asked me to come in and interview for a job.

Jake: What? You're gonna go work for The Vulture? Have you forgotten how awful he is?

[Flashes to Pembrooke showing Amy his underwear]

Pembrooke: [Grunts]

Amy: The Vladimir Putin Collection?

Pembrooke: Yeah, 70 bucks a pair. And they only increase in value. [Chomps teeth]

[Flashes back to the present]

Jake: I guess that's your new best friend now, Santiago. Emphasis on "iago," backst*bber.

Amy: I'm surprised you've read Othello.

Jake: What the hell's Othello? I'm calling you the parrot from Aladdin.

Amy: I wouldn't be working for The Vulture. I'd be working with him in data analysis.

Jake: Oh, it's just a lousy desk job? Okay, never mind. You're not gonna do that. You love working cases too much. Here's the plan: We're gonna catch this perp. You're gonna remember how much you love your job. You're gonna skip that interview. And that's a Peralta guarantee.

Amy: Your last Peralta guarantee was that you could dunk a basketball.

[Flashes to him dunking a basketball]

Jake: I never said I couldn't use a ladder. Peralta guarantee achieved. [Ladder falls] Aah!

[Flashes forward to the present]

Jake: The subtext of the guarantee was that you would be entertained, and you were. Let's go!

Terry: Okay, so I've already taken care of a few obvious problems. I moved the toaster to the break room, far away from Boyle.

Holt: Good. What's this red area here, the Diaz triangle?

Terry: Right, so you know about Rosa's anger incidents.

[Flashes to a Rosa anger incident]

Rosa: It's my birthday. I hate birthdays. If you wish me a Happy Birthday, I will punch you.

Scully: You're a funny little bird, Diaz. Happy Birthday. [She punches him in the stomach and he grunts]

[Flashes back to the present]

Terry: Any time Mt. Diaz erupts, everyone on the squad avoids her.

Holt: Mt. Diaz. Humorous, yes.

Terry: Tell me, what room is just down the hall from her desk?

Holt: The bathroom.

Terry: If people are afraid to walk by Diaz, bathroom breaks would be to a minimum. [They both stare out at the bullpen thoughtfully]

[Next scene]

Terry: Hey, Diaz, I just need to make sure I've got the details right in this file.

Rosa: Yeah, guy was passing bad checks.

[Holt switches her computer with a broken one]

Terry: But is this the same guy?

Rosa: Yeah, the name here is the same name on the checks.

Holt: Ca-caw!

Terry: Okay, all right, thank you, thank you.

Holt: Ca-caw!

Terry: Got it.

Rosa: [She tries to use her computer] Come on! I'm so sick of these sucky computers. [She throws her computer] Aah! [She stomps on it and uses a fire extinguisher on it]

Rosa: [She points it at Hitchcock] One more step and you're next.

Hitchcock: [Grunts and walks away]

Jake: [Knocks on the door] NYPD.

Melipnos: [Opens the door] Yes, Melipnos?

Jake: Oh, boy.

Amy: NYPD, sir. Have you seen anything unusual today?

Melipnos: Oh, no. This was nice, thank you. [Starts to close the door]

Jake: Wait, wait, wait. What is this music?

Melipnos: Oh, this is from my country: Leirkrakeegovnia. Do you like it?

Jake: I weirdly do.

[Next scene]

Both: [Dancing and singing]

meil on fun

Me teeme asju mis on ponev

Olemme sobrad kasu

Jake: See, Amy, fun thing about working cases, you meet people from all over the world.

Melipnos: This song is a celebration song from when a dog loses its virginity.

Jake: Who checks that?

[Next scene]

Man: I was having a smoke, and I saw a bellboy take his jacket off and throw it in the dumpster, then go back inside.

Jake: Well, that's unusual.

Man: Yeah, that's why I'm telling you.

Jake: Looks like we are going dumpster diving.

Amy: Great.

Jake: ♪ Come with me, Amy, to the dumpster me and Amy going diving in the dumpster ♪

[Next scene]

Jake: [In the dumpster] I can't believe you would ever consider leaving this job. This is real police work, and you love it. Remember that time you had to shove your hand down that woman's throat to get her car keys?

Amy: Why do you even care if I leave?

Jake: Because The Vulture is the worst. That whole division is the worst. They steal cases. It's the lowest of the low.

Amy: So if I transferred somewhere else, you wouldn't care at all?

Jake: No, of course not. Do whatever you want, you know, it's your life. Aha! The jacket. This case is heating up.

Amy: Ooh, receipt in the pocket.

Jake: Dust it for prints.

Amy: And send a scan to Boyle.

Jake: Yes. You're feeling it now. Whoo!

[Next scene]

Jake: The thief's name is Benjamin Disanto. Here's an old mug shot. He's surprisingly photogenic. A lot of criminals are, strangely.

Angela: He doesn't work here. Must have stolen the bellhop uniform.

Amy: Receptionist just spotted Disanto entering the Salieri Ballroom. What's going on in there?

Angela: An auction of Greek antiquities.

Jake: Ah, I believe it's pronounced "antiques."

Amy: I'm sorry about my partner. He's never been to a museum.

Jake: Have so.

Amy: Wax museums don't count.

Jake: Then why are they called museums? It's right there in the name.

Amy: Oh, my God. Come on.

Terry: It's going really well, sir. We've gone from 10 cases per hour to almost 20.

Holt: It's good, but we can do better. Tell me about the Boyle-Linetti Reaction.

Terry: Boyle gets cold a lot because of what he calls his...

[Flashes to Boyle saying it]

Charles: Medically diagnosed thin skin.

[Flashes back to the present]

Terry: So he goes to the lost and found, and he grabs something that's usually unflattering. That's when Gina gets involved.

[Flashes to what Gina does]

Gina: [Giggles] Sweet sweater, Charles. You look like you're starring in an Albanian remake of The Cosby Show. Dr. Huxtable, Dr. Huxtable.

[Flashes forward to the present]

Terry: Gina is completely useless when Boyle is wearing lost-and-found clothes.

Holt: Well, I really can't blame her on this one. Maybe we should just, uh, empty lost and found.

Terry: Already done, sir.

[Indistinct chatter]

Terry: Good lord. Where did he get that?

Holt: Oh, my God, we're doomed. Boyle looks like a lesbian.

Terry: He must have gotten it from the evidence locker or something. Don't worry. I had a backup plan. I distracted her with a mirror. She's like a cockatiel, sir... Fascinated by her own reflection.

Gina: [Looking at herself in a mirror] Mm. Hello, sexy, how are you?

Charles: Right back at ya.

Holt: Well done.

Jake: Good afternoon, sir, I'm Detective Peralta. [Turns his head to Amy] This is Detective Always-Stays-Loyal. She's named after her father Alvin Stays-Loyal. We're tracking a thief that's stolen thousands of dollars worth of jewelry.

Amy: We think he's scouting auction winners, so he can Rob their rooms. We called for backup, but we need to move now. And we have to keep it quiet.

Irwin: What can I do to help?

Jake: Well, there's too many people in here. I need a better vantage point. Any way I can get up onstage by the podium?

Amy: You'll blow our cover if you go up there. You don't exactly blend in.

Jake: Yeah. Irwin, how would you like to have the honor of being the first man to undress in front of Amy Santiago?

Amy: Okay. [Walks away]

[Next scene]

Jake: Here we go. Hello, everyone. My name is Roger Strikewell, and I will be your guest auctioneer this evening. So many faces to look at. I won a radio contest, and I'm so excited to be here tonight to sell you all of these cool, old, Greek things. Our first item up for bid is lot number 344. It is this old "vase," "vahs" if you're nasty. It was made in the year... five and depicts the classic Greek fable: Boy meets girl, boy has goat legs. And on the back, just a whole bunch of wheat. So let's start the bidding at $10. [Everyone puts up their paddles]

Jake: [Overlapping chatter] Okay, started it way too low.

Terry: We've done it, sir. If we stay on this pace, I think we'll finish on time.

Holt: I think we should keep going, make the office even more efficient.

Terry: Sir, are you familiar with the story of Icarus? He didn't know when to quit. He flew too close to the sun, and his wax wings melted, and he died.

Holt: Are you familiar with the story of Moneyball? A man uses statistics and logic to win several baseball games. It's my favorite film.

[Flashes to him watching Moneyball and crying]

Holt: The statistical analysis... [Crying] It's so beautiful.

[Flashes forward to the present]

Holt: This office is becoming a powerhouse of paperwork processing. I'm flying high, Sergeant, and I'm never coming down.

Jake: I have 85. Do I have 90? I have 90 from the man with the face at table four.

Adam Sandler: This is terrible... you don't know what you're doing.

Jake: Adam Sandler?

Adam Sandler: Yeah, that's right. I collect antiquities. I'm a serious person. I'm writing a movie right now about the Russian Revolution.

Jake: Oh, really? Who does Kevin James play in it?

Adam Sandler: Ha, ha. It's a serious movie. Trotsky.

Jake: Ah, there it is.

Adam Sandler: But he's got a wife who never wears a bra. I think you're gonna like it.

Jake: Thanks for dressing up, by the way. All right, back to this plate. I think you could use it for a variety of things.

Adam Sandler: [Gets on stage] New item up there. How much you guys wanna pay for me to stick my socks in this moron's mouth?

Joe Theismann: I will.

Jake: Did football legend Joe Theismann just bid $1,000 to put a sock in my mouth?

Joe Theismann: You bet.

Adam Sandler: Okay, but let's get it going a little higher.

Jake: Seriously, back to the p*rn* plate--

Adam Sandler: Uh, 1,200 bucks, sock in the mouth? Boom, okay, the idiot gets the sock in the mouth. I'd say 1,300 would be even better.

Joe Theismann: 1,300!

Adam Sandler: Joe Theismann coming in strong. I got 1,300.

Jake: 25,000 from--

Adam Sandler: And a one and a two and a... Boom, sold to Joey Theismann! Congratulations, you're getting a sock in your mouth, 1,300 bucks, Joe Theismann.

Joe Theismann: Can I stick the sock in his mouth? I'll pay extra.

Jake: Yes, you may, because I just sold my item to the man in the gray shirt at table 18. NYPD. You're under arrest.

Amy: Heading your way. [Jake tosses the microphone and jumps off the stage]

♪ [Upbeat music] ♪

[Jake gets on a table and jumps off it tackling the suspect and Joe Theismann]

[Crowd gasping]

Jake: [Grunts] Gotcha!

Joe Theismann: My leg! My leg! You broke my other leg. Uh... Oh, this was supposed to be a safe event.

Jake: Nothing to see here. Except for the bone, sticking out of the leg.

Adam Sandler: Joe, I video'd it!

[Next scene]

Jake: What a day, huh? Met Adam Sandler, broke Joe Theismann's leg, and solved an awesome case together.

Amy: Yeah, good day.

Jake: Hell yeah, it is. Drinks are on me.

Amy: Jake, I'm still doing the interview.

Jake: What? No. [Scoffs] Don't do that. We still have to process the perp. You love processing... It's your favorite thing, after organizing your emails and replacing toilet paper rolls.

Amy: This job would be a great opportunity for me.

Jake: Okay, whatever. You know what? You're being a bad partner. You're joining forces with the enemy. And from now on, I'm gonna call you "The Cheetah." They're scavengers, just like vultures. And I kinda wish I hadn't said it, 'cause they're pretty cool. Come on, jewel thief. You're my only friend now. [He walks away with the suspect leaving Amy alone]

[Next scene]

Jake: Scully, what are you doing at my desk? And working? What is going on today?

Scully: The Captain put me here. Says I waste time when I sit next to Hitchcock.

[Flashes to Scully rubbing Hitchcocks head with both hands and back to the present]

Jake: Okay, well, go work in the break room.

Holt: Hello, Peralta.

Jake: Ah, a human greeting, nicely done.

Holt: Updates on the case?

Jake: Well, you're gonna love this one. We busted the guy for grand larceny. And to celebrate, Santiago is taking a job interview at major crimes. Can you believe that?

Holt: Yes, she told me yesterday.

Jake: What? Why didn't you try and talk her out of it? She would literally shave her head if you asked her to. Which, by the way, is a great idea for a prank, if you're looking to prank her.

Holt: Santiago wants to make Captain one day. I know, because I've frequently caught her wearing my hat and looking into a mirror.

[Flashes to Amy in Holts office wearing his hat]

Amy: [Looking into a mirror] Dismissed. [Saluts]

[Flashes back to the present]

Holt: I support her decision. That's what good detectives do. They have each other's back, no matter what.

Scully: All right, let's move on to your unpaid parking tickets.

Arrested Man: Dude. Dude, fire.

Scully: Oh, my. Fire. Uh, hey! Fire! [Gasps]

Charles: Oh, I-I got it, okay. Here we go. Here we go, Boyle. I got it. [Puts out fire] What happened, Scully?

Scully: I didn't know there was a toaster there. Why is the toaster there?

Charles: Uh-oh. Aah! [His fringe on his jacket catches fire] My fringe! My beautiful fringe!

Scully: Boyle's on fire! [Alarm sounding]

[Overlapping shouting]

Terry: Icarus.

Rosa: Extinguisher's empty, morons.

Charles: Aah! [Panting]

[Terry puts the fire out with a blanket

Holt: Back to the drawing board.

[Next scene]

Terry: Sir, I'm begging you, please, we have to stop. Boyle is still smoldering.

Holt: The problem is, we didn't take Peralta into account. In our next trial--

Gina: [Clears throat] Hello, boys. Welcome to your own office. I hear you're trying to make the precinct more efficient.

Terry: Gina, what are you doing in the Captain's chair?

Holt: Please, I'm open to any ideas about efficiency.

Gina: I've narrowed the problem down to one location: The Holt-Jeffords vortex. Things would go a lot faster if the two of you did less experimenting and more working. And I'm not the only one who thinks that.

Charles: You melted my fringe.

Rosa: You think I have an anger problem? I don't. You are both dead to me.

Holt: Well, I suppose it's possible we may have been a tad enthusiastic in our pursuit of efficiency...

Terry: Really? A tad, icarus?

Holt: Fine, message received. Jeffords and I will get right to work.

Gina: Great, that will be all. Thank you.

Holt: Get the h*ll out of my chair.

Gina: All right, I pushed it a little bit on that one. Okay, bye.

Jake: Ah, Santiago. Before you go in there, there's something I have to say. I'm sorry I said you were a bad partner. I was the bad partner. The truth is, our job isn't always great. I mean, sometimes it sucks. But it sucks a little less when I get to do it with you. So when you said you were gonna leave, I freaked out, and that was dumb. I should've been more supportive. You're a great Detective, and they'd be lucky to have you. In fact, if it helps, I wrote you a letter of recommendation, which is riddled with spelling errors, I might add. Including the word, "recommendation," which is just... I don't have to tell you about that. There's no way there's four "m"s in that word, right?

Amy: I already turned down the job.

Jake: Seriously?

Amy: In the end, you were right. I don't wanna sit at a desk. And right now, I like where I am.

Jake: Ah.

Amy: [Chuckles] But thanks for thinking I'm great.

Jake: No, I take back all of the things I just said.

Amy: Uh-uh. You said I was a good Detective, and you were nice.

Jake: This is my nightmare.

Amy: [Chuckles]

Pembrooke: Lookee, lookee. I thought I saw your big, white a*s lumbering around. As for you, Santiago, well, now you certainly showed your true colors, didn't you? And they're a shade of pink called "loser."

Jake: All right, everybody just calm down. There's no reason we can't be friends. Here, I brought you a peace offering. [Hands him a tear gas bomb and removes the clip] Run!

Pembrooke: Uh-oh. [The bomb goes off]

Cast

Actor Character
Andy Samberg ... Jake Peralta
... Roger Strikewell
Seth Duhame ... Stunt Double: Andy Samberg
Stephanie Beatriz ... Rosa Diaz
Terry Crews ... Terry Jeffords
Melissa Fumero ... Amy Santiago
Joe Lo Truglio ... Charles Boyle
Chelsea Peretti ... Gina Linetti
Andre Braugher ... Raymond Holt
Dirk Blocker ... Michael Hitchcock
Joel McKinnon Miller ... Norm Scully
Adam Sandler ... Himself
Patton Oswalt ... Fire Marshall Boone
Fred Armisen ... Mlepnos
Joe Theismann ... Himself
Dean Winters ...

Keith Pembroke

Danny Belrose ... Gus Wimbledon

Cool Cool Cool Things

Trivia

  • This is the most-watched episode of the show, with 15.07 million viewers.
  • This drastic jump in viewers is because it premiered after Superbowl XLVIII on February 2, 2014. The episode, therefore, contains many football references:
    • The cold open is the squad playing touch football against the fire department.
    • Terry dominates the game of touch football; actor Terry Crews began his career as a professional football player.
    • There is a guest appearance by Joe Theismann, an acclaimed former American football quarterback and Superbowl winner.
  • The title of the episode is spoken by Jake in reference to their plan to outsmart The Vulture towards the beginning of the episode.
  • Adam Sandler and Joe Theismann both guest star as themselves in this episode. Coincidentally, they share the same birthday, September 9 (9/9).
  • This is the only episode where the main theme song of the show played at the end of the episode.

Soundtrack

  • You're the Best by Joe Esposito plays during the football scenes

  • Jake plays the song "I Got You, Babe" by Sonny and Cher for a perp waiting in the interrogation room.

  • Mlepnos and Jake sing the Leirkrakeegovnian celebration song about a dog losing its virginity with Mlepnos.
  • Jake sings an impromptu song about dumpster diving. "Come with me, Amy, to the dumpster. Me and Amy going diving in the dumpster."
  • Jake sings an impromptu song while making his morning coffee. “Cream in my coffee, and Rock ’n' Roll.”

Running Gags Mentioned

Featured Relationships

Videos

Images


Scenes from Filming

Props and Costumes


Behind The Scenes

  • Andy Samberg (as Jake) & Adam Sandler (as himself) were both in the 2012 comedy film That's My Boy.
  • In the credits, Fred Armisen who portrays Mlepnos is credited as Melpnos.
  • A stunt double was used for Andy Samberg in this episode

From Joe Lo Truglio's Instagram Account: "🎬BTS ACTION! 🎬From Dec 2013, Boyle’s fringes go up in flames. 🔥 That’s Garrett stunt doubling for me. (I wanted to do it, but FOX smartly said not a chance) You hear Scully “Oooo fire!” and Rosa “God!”. Then a shout from our Emmy-award winning coordinator Norman Howell cueing the extinguishers. 💨Norm peeks in on right side of frame at end of clip. He’s been with us from the start and there’s never been an injury. 🙏🏼 This might’ve been the ep that aired after the 2014 Super Bowl, pulling out the big stunts💥

Known Filming Locations
Filming Location City, State Details Scenes
NYPD 78th Precinct Brooklyn, New York Building exterior Establishing shots meant to represent the 99th Precinct
South 5th Street Next to river, beneath Williamsburg Bridge Ensemble walking down the street in the Title Sequence
CBS Studio Center Studio City, California Stage 12 Scenes that take place in the 99th Precinct